Romantic relationships come in many different forms. What works for one couple may not work for another. When we find ourselves constantly longing for more than what our partner is willing to offer us, we are emotionally deprived. We feel starved for attention, warmth, and understanding. We desperately want to connect with our partner, but they have shut us down, shut us out. We feel sad, angry, depressed, and confused. We whine, plead, and beg for the attention we need, but it never comes.
Why does this phenomenon happen in the first place? In romantic relationships, we shut down for various reasons, and the biggest culprit is resentment. Usually, one of the partners withdraws emotionally from the relationship when they shut down. We try and try to communicate our needs, but our requests go on deaf ears. We get frustrated and finally detach altogether.
When one partner detaches or shuts down, the other begins to feel the effects of emotional deprivation.
Some tell-tale signs of emotional deprivation are depression or mood swings, constant disagreements, and basically as little interaction as possible between two people.
When one of the partners has officially checked out, they no longer care if the sad and lonely partner is upset; in essence, they are done. Their physical body may still be in the room, but not their head, heart, or mind. The partner who is left behind feels isolated and very disconnected.
The most important step a couple can take when they feel the other partner or person slipping away is to have a conscious communication talk about what is really going on. The disconnected partner has feelings of resentment and anger that they are burying deep down inside. This repression of feelings has caused detachment. The relationship can be saved if the other partner is willing to listen to all the complaints and issues that the struggling partner has been repressing.
People assume that fighting and conflict are bad in a relationship. The wrong kind of fighting can be toxic to your relationship; resolving conflict as it arises is the key to preventing emotional detachment/deprivation.