Wisdom I Paid For, So You Don’t Have To (Part 1)

A colleague once asked me:

“What’s a piece of wisdom you’ve truly digested—something that shaped who you are today, and that you’d want to pass on?”

Here’s the thing: wisdom isn’t the same as knowledge. Knowledge is information. Wisdom is lived, metabolized experience. It’s the scars you’ve healed, the lessons you’ve integrated, and the truths you’ve earned the hard way—then shared so others don’t have to bleed as much.

Or as Chip Conley says:

Wisdom is what turns us from consuming caterpillars into benevolent butterflies.

That’s what I want for you. Not just more books, more podcasts, more “hacks.” Real wisdom. Real transformation.

I don’t have one single pearl of wisdom that trumps the rest. I have fourteen. So I’m serving them up in two parts. Here are the first seven.

1. This Too Shall Pass

Life’s hardest moments feel endless. The sweetest ones feel like they’ll last forever. Both are illusions.

King Solomon captured it best with the words: “Gam zeh ya’avor”—this too shall pass.

I wear those words inside a locket to remind myself: storms end, and so do sunny days. Which means the work is to be here now. To appreciate the blessing of simply being alive.

2. Whose Business Am I In?

This one’s straight from Byron Katie. There are only three businesses in life:

• God’s business. (The weather. The economy. The things you can’t control.)
• Other people’s business. (Their choices, their reactions, their opinions.)
• Your business. (What you think, feel, say, and do.)

The moment I start suffering, I ask: Whose business am I in?

99% of the time, I’m tangled up in someone else’s or God’s. And that’s wasted energy. The only clean power is in my own lane.

3. You’ll Live

It sounds harsh, right? But it’s one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself—and your kids.

Resilience isn’t built in bubble wrap. It’s built when we realize: we can survive hard things.

When my inner five-year-old thinks she’s going to “die” because someone was rude, or because plans got canceled, I hold her close and whisper: You’ll live.

Because she will. And so will I.

4. Take a Hike

Literally.

When life feels impossible, get outside. Walk. Breathe. Touch the earth.

Answers that feel stuck in the four walls of your home or office show up easily when your body’s in motion. Nature doesn’t erase problems—but it shrinks them down to size.

Wallace Stevens once said: “Perhaps the truth depends on a walk around the lake.” He wasn’t kidding.

5. Start With a Question

Coaching isn’t about finding the “perfect” answer—it’s about living better questions.

What’s next?
Who’s in my circle?
How do I set boundaries without guilt?
Why does this same problem keep knocking at my door?

Most of us wait until we know before we speak up, act, or create. But life doesn’t open for people with answers—it opens for people brave enough to ask.

6. Develop a Taste for Saltwater

Growth doesn’t come from comfort. Regular water keeps you alive, but saltwater changes you.

Discomfort is training. Pain, setbacks, challenges—they stretch us into someone new.

I don’t chase hard times, but when they come, I ask: What gift is hidden in this saltwater? It’s always there.

7. Become Anti-Fragile

Resilience is good. Anti-fragile is better.

Fragile things break under stress. Resilient things withstand it. But the anti-fragile? They get stronger because of it.

That’s who I want you to be. Not someone who merely bounces back, but someone who uses the fire to sharpen herself.

These are the first seven. Next week, I’ll share the rest. Until then, remember: wisdom isn’t collected. It’s embodied.