Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

Have you ever wondered why intimate relationships can make us so crazy?  People close to you will act like mirrors, reflecting back to you an emotion you are actually trying to suppress.  So if you continue to suppress your fears about something your partner will probably hold a mirror to you and say : ” Hey , take a look at some of the feelings you are pushing down.” Rule number #1  you will resist in your partner what you suppress in yourself.  For instance if say Jane is suppressing her anger, not wanting to deal with it, and it goes over to Bob’s tank,  he will start to get angry.  Because she wants to suppress her anger she will try and suppress his anger also.  So when Bob starts to get angry she will try and talk him out of his feelings and say things like “What are you getting angry for?” “Just relax and don’t get angry” etc.  This will actually make the anger much worse.  This happens with parenting your children.  If you suppress your feelings, your children will express them.  Let’s say a parent suppresses their anger towards his/her spouse .  The children will express that same anger and be angry, rebellious, and throw a temper tantrum.   The biggest danger in intimate relationships is when both partners stop expressing all of their emotions altogether.  This leads to a loss of love, passion and aliveness in your intimate relationships.  Break the cycle and understand the see-saw effect with Relationship Coaching.